The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
