it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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