i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
