Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
