seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
