so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
