Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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