I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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