Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
