We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Randomize
