Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
I just googled if crying burns calories
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
where are my pants?
in the oven.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
