I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
