I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
