You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
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