looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Randomize
