chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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