I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
My pussy is not your playground.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
