Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Randomize
