To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize
