somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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