spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
Randomize
