im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
