? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
