3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
being pregnant is like rehab
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.�
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
