Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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