so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
