found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
