Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
