Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
Randomize