Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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