If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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