Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
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