What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
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