I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
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