So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Randomize
