I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
