? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
Randomize
