then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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