I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Randomize
