Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
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