we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Randomize
