GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
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