It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Randomize
