if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
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