How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Randomize
