Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
