it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
