Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
We are two peas in an std pod
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
