just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
