i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I lost the right to judge tonight
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Randomize
